1. Oh God

    I just called my Dad and he answered his phone in the cinema, I said “If I was there I’d have slapped the shit out of you, I’ll talk to you later” and hung up.

    FML.

  2. Cinemas ban the ‘noisy, messy’ snack

    I like popcorn and a litre of Coke. I thought the solution was simple. Eat with your fuckin mouth closed.

    Ban mothers and their babies in M15+ rated movies. Hows that for a good idea?

    Salted, sugar-coated or dripping in butter, it has been a staple for cinema-goers for decades.

    But now it seems the days when movie fans can grab a bucket of popcorn and munch through a film are numbered.

    The snack has been slammed for being smelly, messy and downmarket, prompting an increasing number of cinema chains to ban it.

    From next month, the country’s largest art house chain will introduce popcorn-free screenings.

    'Popcorn is a contentious issue. Lots of people absolutely hate it and have asked us to ban it, so we're going to do exactly that,' said Gabriel Swartland, head of media at the Picturehouse Cinema.

    If this proves a success then the firm, which owns 19 cinemas across the country, will issue a blanket ban.

    Other small chains are adopting a similar strategy in a bid to tap into an upmarket audience.

    Daniel Broch, owner of the renowned Everyman Cinema Club, said that he is aiming to provide a more sophisticated service for cinema-goers.

    He has already banned popcorn from his 17-venue empire, instead offering made-to-order canapes and a waiter service.

    He vowed: ‘I will de-popcorn every new venue I acquire. It has a disproportionate influence on the space in terms of its overwhelming smell, the cultural idea of it and the operational problems created by the mess it produces.’

    The company brochure even features an endorsement from Sir Paul McCartney describing it as ‘too posh for popcorn’.

    Nicolas Kent, artistic director of the award-winning Tricycle cinema and theatre in London, added: ‘Popcorn is horrible stuff and I won’t have it anywhere near my cinema. 

    'It's a form of junk food and that encourages junk entertainment. Its smell is all-pervasive, it makes huge amounts of mess, and it distracts and annoys people intensely.'

    Popcorn is the most profitable thing sold at the cinema, with a bucket costing £4. It is estimated that the mark-up is as much as 10,000 per cent.

    Depending on its price, it can yield more than 90p on every £1 sold. It also, conveniently, makes customers – a captive market – thirsty for drinks.

    In 2002, the British Film Institute described the corn kernel as ‘the most profitable substance on the planet, more than heroin, more than plutonium’. 

    The actual popcorn costs less to produce than the cardboard container it comes in.

    For this reason, it is unlikely that the multiplex cinema chains will follow suit with a blanket ban, but instead will watch to see if the smaller firms can make a success of the alternative strategy and then implement a more selective version.

    Phil Clapp, chief executive of the Cinema Exhibitors’ Association, said: ‘Cinema audiences have remained static for the last five years, at about 170million admissions a year. These new-style cinemas are quite rightly seeking to draw in new audiences by transforming the cinema experience.

    'I would expect that, if this pilot trial is a success, it is something the bigger screens will inevitably look at introducing themselves. Not as an overriding policy, but in the same way they have done with other select screenings.'



    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1043289/Is-end-popcorn-Cinemas-ban-noisy-messy-snack.html#ixzz2268COoRB

  3. Mr Bruce Campbell. One man you do not fuck with.

    Mr Bruce Campbell. One man you do not fuck with.

  4. This should be at the beginning of every movie, in every cinema. Across the world… and Dave Chappelle should do the voiceover

TAKE YOU ASS OUT!

    This should be at the beginning of every movie, in every cinema. Across the world… and Dave Chappelle should do the voiceover

    TAKE YOU ASS OUT!

  5. Angry Moviegoer Shoots Man for Talking During Movie

    Old news is good news.

    This was inevitable. One day someone was bound to get so angry that they’d shoot someone because they wouldn’t shut up during a movie. I know I’ve felt like doing that sometimes, but I’m sane enough to stop before my actions become violent and I don’t own a gun anyway. The story of the weekend (via The Philadelphia Inquirer) involves one James Joseph Cialella Jr., a 29 year old moviegoer who was attending a showing of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button on Christmas Day in Philadelphia. When a father and son sitting in front of him wouldn’t stop talking during the movie, including after Cialella angrily threw popcorn at them, he presumed to get up and shoot the father in the arm with a Kel-Tec .380 handgun.

    Get this, after shooting the father, Cialella put the gun back in his waist and sat back down in his seat to finish the movie. By then, everyone else had scurried out of the movie theater, so now he was enjoying it all alone, in absolute silence. The police were called and arrested him a few minutes later. Cialella is being charged with attempted murder, aggravated assault, and weapons violations. This all occurred at the UA Riverview Theatre in South Philadelphia (seen above), which apparently sees the likes of “ghetto” moviegoers all the time. I’m guessing that no one is attending movies at that theater this weekend.

    Although I do feel bad for the man who was shot and certainly think that Cialella went way too far, this is just a sad look at the current state of movie theaters. The father and son shouldn’t just walk away without learning a lesson. While Cialella shouldn’t have shot them and instead confronted management first or non-violently talked with the man, the father and son deserve to be told to shut up. Talking in movie theaters during movie is unacceptable. If you want to talk, do it at home on your own time. This goes for text messaging during movies, too. But this is a widespread problem that will probably never be solved, even with violence. Maybe one day in the future we’ll have quiet movie theaters. We can dream, can’t we?

    Source: http://www.firstshowing.net/2008/angry-moviegoer-shoots-man-for-talking-during-movie/